Realizations

I think I knew it all along... I do not have it in me to be anything like Martha. I hoped, really hoped, that if I tried hard enough it would happen. But it didn't. And there comes a certain relief with letting other, more talented, people do the things you can not do yourself. A few examples:

Hannah's window bench cushion - I was confident I could make this. It was crafty, but not too crafty. In the end, I gave in and am having an accomplished seamstress make one that will actually look good instead of the hack job I was certain to produce.

Hannah's treats for Valentine's Day - I have the current Valentine's issue of Martha Stewart Living. It has some great ideas for child-friendly treats. Someone else is making cake pops for us. And they'll actually taste good.

Our living room drapes - I never really contemplated making these in a serious way, but it was there in the back of my ultra-cheap mind that I could save a lot of money by doing these myself. Again, went with the seamstress for the whole looking good thing.

So, yes, I am admitting defeat in many areas. In fact, probably every area I had hoped to conquer. However, I am not a complete failure! At least not yet. Because this weekend I am going to make some scones. Scones from one of Martha's own recipes. And that has to count for something...

Holiday Confessions

Martha would be disappointed. I should be ashamed; but instead, I'm strangely indifferent. This holiday season provided the perfect opportunity to display hosting, decorating, and crafting skills carefully accrued over the previous months of alleged efforts to become, well, better, at all of the above.

We hosted staff parties, open houses, and family dinners. I did not make one new recipe. Scott did most of the decorating. I made a Christmas craft that was too ugly to display. We ate off paper plates and used plastic cutlery. I put out store-bought desserts. Heck, I didn't even have holiday napkins. Even at Thanksgiving I get excited about those! So, looking back, I should be experiencing a sense of failure. However, apart from the napkins, I have no regrets.

Perhaps this is just as good as it gets for me. Maybe, in the end, I don't have it in me after all. And while it's an enticing thought to give up and concede defeat, I can't quit just yet. One of my Christmas gifts was a subscription to Martha Stewart Living, and I can't help but feel a tinge of hope that therein lies the secret to my success.

I mean, there will be pictures, right?